They took away my glasses, my flashlight and my watch
All they left me was the silver fox to cover up my crotch. So I staggered through the dark, hoping I could find my clan But instead I stumbled on another naked howling man. I asked was he a Cave Bear, and could he help me please? He said he was a Stag and we were mortal enemies. He gored me with his antlers, I slashed him with my paws, I grabbed him by the neck and held him in my mighty jaws. Then I dropped him on the ground, and gave a mighty roar For I heard a lusty chorus chanting hymns in praise of Thor. There were half a dozen cave bears hunkered down upon a rock And a chicken wrapped in plastic from the Safeway down the block. We planned a rite of passage so we could be born anew But we found we all were circumcised, so what else could we do? We set up a peyote rite, and brother, it was deep. I could tell you more about it if I hadn’t gone to sleep. Now the weekend’s over and I’m on the freeway home. Along with my bold comrades no longer can I roam. No more wading in the river, or leaping from the rocks And there’s mud and blood and chicken grease on Martha’s silver fox. With me rantin-toorin-addie-fol-da-di-do. |